1. Initiator
    • makes a request by relating as victim or rescuer
    • *begins
  2. Rescuer
    • relates by doing for or talking care of victims, thereby telling them that they are uncapable of being self reliant
    • *helps
  3. Victim
    • relates by asking for help, asking to be kicked, or allowing himself or herself to be kicked
    • *asks for help
  4. Rescuing
    doing for someone else, stops growth because creates dependency
  5. Facilitating
    responds by helping a person make their own decisions, causes growth and self reliance, as adult should raise a child
  6. See what you made me do!
    *must write out
    • initiaor: victim--> what should i do?
    • rescuer: Do this.
    • ~goes wrong~
    • *role switch*
    • victim--> persecutor--> Bad choice, you messed me up
    • rescuer--> victim--> Feels bad
  7. If it weren't for you.
    *must write out
    • initiator: victim--> What should I do?
    • rescuer: Do NOT do.
    • victim--> persecutor--> turned out bad !
    • rescuer--> victim :-( sorry
  8. Yes...but
    *must write out
  9. Now I've got you.
    • initiator: rescuer--> I'll help you______ (after school)
    • victim: Ok, I need help, but I can't stay today. (excuse)
    • rescuer--> persecutor- find out excuse is a lie, asks where you were
    • victim--> lies& GETS CAUGHT!!
  10. Kick Me
    • initiator--> rescuer--> I'll help you by doing a favor (ex. prom shoes)
    • victim--> Thanks!
    • ~fall though~
    • victim--> persecutor- you let me down!
    • rescuer--> victim- sorry! :-(
  11. 4 Steps of facilitating
    *know verbadum
    • 1.) touch base with feelings
    • 2.) clarify what the other person wants to do
    • 3.) expole ways of doing what the other person wants to do
    • 4.) develop a plan of action
  12. Contract
    Mutual agreement to what is expected from a relationship to keep playing games; changes and grows
  13. Contract
    Image Upload 1
  14. Persecuting
    aims at establishing blame or fault from parent and child; shouts angrily; embarrasses, hurts, frustrates
  15. Negotiating
    touching base with your feelings then setting guidelines so that negative feelings can be avoided in the future
  16. Game playing
    • leads to arguing and hurt feelings
    • you want to avoid it
Card Set
psychology chapters 7-9