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MC; Ladies and Gentlemen our first act of the evening, back by public transport- lovable, larger than life Chubby Chuff!
- Took the mother-in-law on safari last year.She got attacked by three lions.
- My wife says
- "Aren't you gonna help?"
- I said no,
- three should be enough.
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Laughter
- She's a big woman,
- The mother-in-law.
- She joined one of them gymnasiums,
- got on the rowing machine
- and the bloody thing sank.
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audience reaction.
- She came round for dinner last nightand I did one of them Freudian slips.
- I meant to say,
- "could you pass the butter please"
- But what I actually said was
- "you ugly bastard you've ruined my life."
-
Rita: You got any jokes about fat men?!
- Oh hello gorgeous,
- woman's libber, hey?
- Burn your bra
- I'd pay to see that.
-
Beryl: Don't you slag off our Rita or I'll come up there and sit on your face.
- I'm serious,if I was her dad, love,
- Id still be doing bath time.
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All: Oi! /What it you/Whadyermean! I can believe he said that.
Beryl takes the mic and improvises a gag......
MC: Off the stage. Off the stage. We've got anothe act coming.
Leave stage.
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