1. What is attachment theory?
    • Bowlby (1973)
    • Infants must develop a relationship with at least one primary caregiver 
    • Infants seek proximity when distressed 
    • Separation leads to protest (crying and searching) despair (deeper issues such as depression) then detachment (symptoms subside)
    • Supported by Harlow (1958) monkeys show these traits when separated from comforting objects and mothers 
    • This is echoed in romantic partners 
    • We seek them when distressed 
    • Similar processes occur when separation occurs (Parkes, 1972)
  2. What effects does attachment theory have on development?
    • Self concepts and beliefs such as self worth and our perception of others develop in childhood
    • These influence but do not determine adult attachments
  3. What does secure attachment lead to?
    • Brennan et al (1995)
    • More stable and satisfying relationships 
    • Knowledge that proximity seeking leads to support and comfort (turn to others when distressed)
    • The belief that distress is manageable 
    • Distress is acknowledged and events are seen as less stressful
  4. What does attachment anxiety lead to?
    • Strong need to be close to people, accepted and reassured 
    • Hyperactivity of negative thought and emotion 
    • Hyper-vigilant focus on attachment figures 
    • Distance from attachment figures minimised 
    • Clinging and controlling 
    • More likely to hold on to feelings for an ex (Spielmann et al., 2010)
    • Try harder when meeting new potential dates (Brumbaugh & Fraley, 2010)
    • Less selective at speed dating (McClure et al., 2010)
    • Fear of being single (Spielmann et al., 2013)
  5. What does attachment avoidance lead to?
    • Feelings of independence, low desire for social bonds 
    • Uncomfortable with closeness, self disclosure and feeling and expressing intimacy 
    • Deactivation of attachment systems (avoid intimacy by not acknowledging distress and suppressing distressing thoughts and memories)
    • Expect relationship failure (Birnie et al, 2009)
    • Lower commitment (Gere et al, 2013)
    • More infidelity (DeWalle et al, 2011)
    • Separation doesn't lead to attachment worries unless under cognitive load (Rholes et al, 2007)
    • Avoid attention to attachment words unless under cognitive load (Edelstein & Gillath, 2008)
    • Low accuracy in reading the emotions of their partner (Simpson et al, 2011)
  6. How does childhood experience affect adult attachment?
    • Sensitive maternal caregiving at 18 months
    • predicted less anxiety and avoidance with
    • romantic partners at 22 years (Zayas et al., 2011)

    • Secure infants had higher quality conflict
    • discussions & more relationship satisfaction as adults (Roisman et al., 2005)

    40% environment, 60% genetic (Donnellan et al., 2008; Picardi et al, 2010)
  7. How can relationship closeness be built?
    • Provide opportunities for people to help and co-operate 
    • Experiment in trust (trust falls)
    • Promote self disclosure with increasing intimacy 
    • Share new experience and create shared memories 
    • Mutually share personal experiences
  8. How can you make someone fall in love?
    • Aron et al 2013: the experimental generation of interpersonal closeness 
    • 36 questions requiring increasing levels of trust, disclosure and intimacy 
    • E.g, if you could wake up tomorrow having gained any quality or ability what would it be?
  9. What is the investment model?
    • Rusbult (1980)
    • Composed of 3 levels that are positively correlated with commitment:
    • Satisfaction level
    • Quality of alternatives 
    • Investment size
  10. How do satisfaction levels affect investments?
    • To what extent are your needs met?
    • All relationships experience levels of low satisfaction
  11. How do alternatives affect investments?
    • The quality of alternatives is the attractiveness of the best available alternative to a relationship
    • Can my needs be met elsewhere?
  12. How does investment size affect investments?
    The amount of resources that are tied up in a relationship and, should it end, would decline in value
  13. How does the investment model relate to abusive relationships?
    • Desire to leave and level of abuse is the satisfaction
    • The levels of education and income are the alternatives 
    • The duration of the relationship and marital status is the investment (Rusbult & Martz, 1995)
  14. What have studies found about relarionship dissolution?
    • Most first marriages will end in divorce or
    • permanent separation (Bramlett & Mosher, 2002)

    Even in marriages that remain in tact, newlyweds’ initially high levels of marital satisfaction declines over time (Van Laningham et al. 2001).
  15. What are positive illusions?
    • Essential to relarionships (Murray, Holmes, &
    • Griffin, 1996)
    • Perceptual bias towards the positive 

    When the negative cannot be ignored, shift what is important to you in a relationship (Neff & Karney, 2003)
  16. Why are positive illusions hard to maintain?
    • Making allowances for a spouses inevitable
    • shortcomings is difficult. It is cognitively demanding and requires attention and motivation

    • Ability to maintain positive illusions is undermined by:
    • Cognitive styles, personality traits, childhood
    • experiences
    • Strains: work load, financial stress, health
    • problems
  17. What do implications do findings about separations raise?
    • Public policy that improves family and individual
    • well-being and welfare should reduce strain and
    • increase capacity for maintaining positive illusions

    Norway: After the government began offering cash incentives to parents that elected to stay home with children, divorce rates fell significantly (Hardoy & Schone, 2008)
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