chapter 5 continue

reversion to an earlier mental or behavioral level

• childlike state
•  
• making excuses for not doing a certain thing

replacing can't with wont

I'd like to get better grades but I can't find time to study

unwanted desires or impulses are excluded from the consciousness and left to operate in the unconscious

I should phone my brother since we fought but I just can't deal with that now

lack of feeling emotion interest or concern

I dont care what grade I got on the test I am not going to pass the class anyway

redirection of an emotion or impulse form its original object and idea or person to another object

I have enough problems at work I don't need to come home to a nagging wife

a psychological defense mechanism in which a person avoids confronting a personal problem or dying the existence of the problem

my husband can't have cancer he is completly healthy

some events are so painful that a person may completley avoid any representation of the event

I will never go to that restaurant again because thats where my ex-husband told me he wanted a divorce

attribution of one's own ideas feelings attitudes to other people ro to objects to externalization of blame guilt or reponsibility against anxiety

everyone else is late so why am I getting reprimanded for it

rule book for personal actions

avoiders refuse to fight

refuse to face up to a conflict either by giving in or by pretending nothing is wrong

instead of saying straight outh that they do not want or do not approve of somthing they try to make their partners feel responsible for causing pain

shifting the conversation whenever it approaches an aea of conflict

do not allow their relationships to change from the way they once were

they bring up things that are totally of subject as in everything

holding something back

get bact at their partners by sabotage by failing to defen them attacker and by encouraging ridicule

top of triangle

• self-actualization
• esteem and recognition
• love and belonging
• safety and security
• physiologic needs: oxygen food water