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What theory did Family Systems theory grow out of?
General Systems theory which was proposed by Ludwig von Bertalanffy (biologist)
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What does family systems theory suggests?
Everything that happens to any family member has an impact on everyone else in the family because its members are interconnected
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What are feelings of emotional closeness with another person?
Cohesion
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What is openness and resistance to change when appropriate called?
Flexibility
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What is the difference between the Intrapsychic and the Systems Approach in therapy?
Intrapsychic focuses on the "troubled" individual whereas Systems Approach focuses on the "Family" system
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The Circumplex Model was developed by David Olson. What does it focus on, and what are the four levels of it?
- Focus is on Emotional Closeness with another person
- Four Levels
- - Connected: balance of separateness and togetherness (somewhat more individual)
- - Cohesive: balance of separateness and togetherness (somewhat more togetherness)
- - Enmeshed: extreme high level of cohesion (extreme togetherness)
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What are the four levels of flexibility that can occur in leadership roles and relationship rules?
- Four Levels
- - Rigid: low degree of change (extreme stability)
- - Structured: moderate degree of change (balanced but somewhat more flexibility
- - Flexible: higher degree of change of change (balanced but somewhat more flexibility
- - Chaotic: Very high degree of change (extreme lack of stability)
- Needs to be a balance between Stability and Change.
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What is commitment?
- Personal DedicationDesire for a future together
- Couple identity
- Greater priority for the relationship
- Willing to Sacrifice
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What are the three different Types of Commitment?
- Conditional CommitmentConstraint Commitment
- Dedication Commitment
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What Type of Commitment is characterized by the following:
- A hidden, conditional aspect that doesn't become apparent until difficulties come
- Consumer Culture: Cost/Benefit analysis of relationship
- Alternative Monitoring: thinking about what it would be like to be with someone else
Conditional Commitment
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What Type of Committment is characterized by the following:
- A sense of obligation (being stuck, committed to not getting a divorce)
- Social Pressure (What would your family say)
- Concern for Children
- Concern for Spouse's welfare
Constraint Commitment
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What Type of Commitment is characterized by the following:
- Internal state of devotion to a person, and to the relationship (involves agape love; making choices to give up choices)
- Involves acceptance of flaws and behavior (because of unsolvable problems)
- Accepting mate as they are instead of trying to change them.
Dedication Commitment
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What are some methods of building Oneness?
- Spend Time together (Quality & Quantity)
- Connecting Rituals
- Have Fun!
(Life doesn't have to be all work and no play) - Show Appreciation
(have much more positive interactions than negative interactions: 5 to 1 principle) - Learn to Communicate (Women tend to pursue in conflict; Men tend to distance)
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What are John Gottman's Four Horseman of the Apocalypse?
- Criticism: Attacking someone's personality or character rather than a specific behavior.
- Defensiveness: defending oneself from a perceived attack; denying responsibility, making excuses, blaming.
- Contempt: Intention to insult and psychologically abuse your partner. Suggesting you are superior. Insults, mockery, name calling, sarcasm, correcting bad grammar, eye rolling.
- Stonewalling: Tuning out, acting like you couldn't care less
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What are the PREP danger signs?
- Escalation: partners respond back and forth negatively to each other, upping the ante, increasing hostility
- Invalidation: subtly or directly putting down the thoughts, feelings, or character of the other
- Negative Interpretation: believing thtat the motives of the other are more negative than is the case. Fuels hopelessness; often involves "mindreading"
- Withdrawal & Avoidance: showing an unwillingness to get into or stay with important discussions. More often men than women.
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During what time are conflict resolution styles primarily developed in a marriage?
Within the first year of marriage
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What are the three "P's" of problem solving from the Christian PREP?
- Problem Discussion
- - Often couples don't fully understand the conflict itself or each other's perspective?
- PrayerProblem Solution
- - Brainstorm
- - Come to an agreement
- - Follow up to make sure everyone is doing what they said they would do
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What chemical is involved in feelings of excitement, well being, and exhilaration? Also rewards us for healthy exciting behavior or for unhealthy and destructive exciting behavior.
Dopamine
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What chemical has a bonding and trusting effect and is primarily active in females? Released during intimate touching (hugging) and childbirth
Oxytocin
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What chemical is responsible for bonding to mate and attaching to offspring? Also primarily active in males and released during sexual intercourse.
Vasopressin
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A relationship that is sexually active but not focused on the relationship or any type of intimacy to the other person is probably based on _______?
Lust
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