IPC Final

  1. Why do we form social relationships?
    • 1. Need to belong: an hypothesis that says each of us is born with a fundatmental drive to seek, form, maintain, and protect strong social relationships.
    • * Relationships must be interactive and emotionally close to satisfy this need.
    • 2. Rewards
    • - Emotional (Support, happiness, etc.)
    • - Material (favors)
    • - Health
    • 1. Happiness and relaxation from relationships helps to reduce and manage stress.
    • 2. Friends can look out for our well-being.
  2. Physical Attraction
    Attraction to one's physical appearance
  3. Interpersonal Attraction
    Any force that draws people together to form a relationship.
  4. Social Attraction
    Attraction to one's personality
  5. Task Attraction
    Attraction to one's ability and dependibility
  6. Appearance
    • Attraction Factor
    • We value attractiveness and so want to spend time with attractive people
    • Attractive features= healthy genes = healthy babies
    • Attractive features vary across cultures
    • But some are cross cultural:
    • Symmetry
    • Healthy, young (potentially child-bearing) women
    • Powerful men with resources
  7. Proximity
    • Attraction Factor
    • We are more likely to form relationships with those in close proximity to us
    • - Has become less influential courtesy of the internet
  8. Similarity
    • Attraction Factor
    • Being around those similar to us can make us feel better about ourselves
    • Similarity phsyically distinguishes relatives from non-relatives
    • Similar genetic material= motivation to share with and help each other
    • Ensures the survival of our genes
  9. Complementarity
    • Attraction Factor
    • When the differences in another benefit (i.e. a shy person befriending someone outgoing)
    • Differences much be seen as positive
    • If differences threaten our views, likelihood of positive feelings decreases
    • - Unless we enjoy engaging in other ways of thinking.
  10. Uncertainity Reduction Theory
    • People are motivated to reduce uncertainity about others
    • - Starts with basic information
    • - The less uncertainity you have about someone, the more likely you are to like them.
  11. Predicted Outcome Value Theory
    • We form relationships when we think the effort will be worth it
    • - Governed by the primacy effect
    • -- If we like the person when we first meet them, we'll try to get to know them more.
  12. Social Exchange Theory
    • People seek to maintain relationships where the benefits outweigh the costs
    • - Comparison level: your realistic expectation of what you deserve in a relationship.
    • -- Influences satisfaction strongly
    • -Comparison level for alternatives: your assessment of how good your current relationship is compared with your other options
    • -- Influences length of relationships
  13. Equity Theory
    A good relationship is one in which your ratio of costs and rewards id equal to your partner's in the long run.
  14. Win-win Conflict Resolution Style Steps
    • 1. Define the conflict and your unmet needs
    • 2. Set a time and share your needs with the other person
    • 3. Listen to the other person's needs and see it from their perspective.
    • 4. Generate a list of posssible solutions
    • 5. Evaluate possible solutions and choose the best one
    • 6. Implement the solution
    • 7. Follow up to make sure the solution is working
  15. Relationship Escalation Stages
    • 1. Initiation: meeting and interacting for the first time. *Can occure online or face to face.
    • 2. Experimenting: having conversations to learn more about the other person. (Where most potential relationships end.)
    • 3. Intensifying: Moving from being acquaintances to close friends
    • - Spending more time together, possibly meeting each other's friends, sharing more intimate information, increased commitment to relationship
    • - Formal Dating
    • 4. Integrating: forming a deep commitment and developing a relationship with its own identity.
    • - Individuals think of themselves as a pair, people call them a couple
    • - Partners take action to demonstrate their relationship to others and may begin to socialize more with other couples
    • 5. Bonding: making a public announcement of commitment to each other
    • - Can be marriage, engagement, moving in together, etc.
    • -- Is done to express commitment in a public way and gain the support and approval of people in their social networks.
  16. Relationship Dissolution Stages
    • 1. Differentiating: Partners begin to see their differences as undesirable or annoying
    • - Occurs from time-to-time, but becomes problematic when it leads to other dissolution stages.
    • 2. Circumscribing: decreased quality and quantity of communication between partners
    • - When together, they don't talk about problems, disagreements, or sensitive issues.
    • - The couple is trying to avoid conflict.
    • 3. Stagnating: Couple barely communicates
    • - Avoidance of conflict
    • - Can last a long time
    • - Partners may feel trapped or may feel uncomfortable at the thought of leaving the relationship.
    • 4. Avoiding: Partners create emotional and physical distance between them.
    • - Can be direct (moving out, etc.) or indirect (making excuses, screening calls, etc.)
    • - Can help partners gain needed perspective, so they try to come back together
    • - Can also re-inforce their reasons for being apart
    • 5. Terminating: the relationship is deemed to be officially over
    • - May involved moving out, telling others, negotiating rules of contact, divorce, etc.
  17. Self-Disclosure
    • The act of giving others information about oneself that one believes they do not already have
    • In order to self-disclose we must deliberately share this information and believe it to be true.
    • Is risky and involves trust
  18. Social Penetration Theory
    • (Irwin Altman and Dalmas Taylor) As relationships develop, communication increases in breadth and depth
    • Breadth- range of topics about which one person self-discloses to another
    • Depth- the intimacy of the topics about which one person self-discloses to another
  19. Interpersonal Conflict
    An expressed struggle between interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference
  20. Characteristics of Conflict
    • 1. Conflict is an expressed struggle
    • 2. Conflict occurs between interdependent parties
    • * Can be within yourself, as well as with others
    • 3.Conflict is about goals the parties see as incompatible.
    • 4. Conflict arises over perceived scarce resources.
    • 5. Conflict includes interference.
    • - One person behaves in ways to prevent the other from achieving their goals.
  21. I Messages
    • 3 Parts:
    • *1. How you feel
    • *2. The behavior that prompts your feeling
    • *3. What you find problematic about the behavior
  22. Needs Theory
    There are three interpersonal needs that motivate us to interact with others in particular ways: need for control, need for inclusion, and need for affection. (Will Schutz)
  23. Need for control
    One's need to maintain a degree of influence in one's relationships.
  24. Need for Inclusion
    One's need to belong to a social group and be included in the activities of others
  25. Need for Affection
    One's need to give and receive expressions of love and appreciation.
  26. Confirming Responses
    • 1. Directly acknowledge and provide the person with a comment about what they said.
    • 2. Agreement with perception of their judgment (I get where you're coming from)
    • 3. Confirm their feelings
    • 4. Supportive response
    • 5. Confirm what they are saying before going to your point or opinion.
    • 6. Expression of positive feelings
    • 7.Clarifying response
  27. Disconfirming Responses
    • 1. Interrupting response
    • 2. Irrelevant response (unrelated)
    • 3. Turning the comment around
    • 4. Denying the other's feelings
    • 5. Ambiguous response
    • 6. Non-supportive response
  28. Responding Non-definsively to Criticism
    • 1. Ask for More Specific Information
    • 2. Guess about specifics if the person can't tell you
    • 3. Paraphrase the speaker's ideas (using the same three parts of an I message)
    • 4. Ask what the critic wants
    • 5. Ask if there is anything else wrong. Only use this if you suspect something else is going on.
    • 6. Agree with what is true about what the other person says. (This is not agreeing with what they say; only stating what you agree with.)
    • 7. Agree with their perception. (I can see why you might see itthat way.)
  29. Gridlock
    • When people in a relationship cannot solve a problem. (No matter what the do, it keeps reoccuring)
    • Goals are seen as incompatible
    • While there is temporary compromise, the conflict is ongoing
  30. Why self-disclose?
    • Enhancement of the relationship
    • Reciprocity
    • Emotional release
    • Assistance to others
  31. Risks of Self-Disclosure
    • Rejection
    • Chance of obligating others
    • Hurt to others
    • Violation of people's privacy
    • Risks of disclosing online
  32. Avoidance
    • Conflict Resolution Style
    • Lose/Lose
    • 0/0 on the Relationship/Task scale
    • Focuses on avoiding conflict, can be leavin the room or something similar.
    • "Cool down" time.
  33. Accommodating
    • Conflict Resolution Style
    • Lose/Win
    • 10/0 on the Relationship/Task scale
    • One person gives in to the other, even at the expense of their own goals.
  34. Competing
    • Conflict Resolution Style
    • Win/Lose
    • 0/10 on the Relationship/Task scale
    • One person confronts the other and more or less makes the choice by force.
  35. Compromise
    • Conflict Resolution Style
    • Lose/Lose
    • 5/5 on the Relationship/Task scale
    • Both parties give up a little something
  36. Collaborating
    • Conflict Resolution Style
    • Win/Win
    • 10/10 on the Relationship/Task Scale
    • Both parties work together to come up with a new solution or perhaps even a new goal.
Card Set
IPC Final
Flashcards for the Interpersonal Communications Final JCCC Helmick